Sobriety. If you asked me what this odd word meant 12 months ago I would have probably asked you what type of shooter it is, sounds like a drop my pants type of potent. Now 12 months down the line, one of the most meaningful words in my vocabulary, sobriety. It’s like not being able to see clearly and finally getting a good pair of glasses, it opens up doors that were never there.

Looking back now it’s been a long and amazing experience and it was pretty easy giving up the drinking lifestyle and habits that once suppressed and controlled my life once I saw how wonderful sobriety could be. Alcohol does not just put us in another mindset of fun, it changes the way that we see life, the way we think, the way we feel, the way we act. We let parties and drinking become a routine in our lives, 4 to 5 nights a week of getting hammered just so that we can suffer at work the next day and then do it all over again the next night.

Don’t get me wrong, I do not regret the party lifestyle that I lived for a single second, I do however regret some decisions, some friendships, all the money spent and the list goes on. The lessons that alcohol taught me could not have been learned by living the normal life that I am currently living, but without letting go of alcohol and getting my life into a state of sobriety, I would have never been able to see the lessons that alcohol taught me. All those bad decisions, the money wasted, the late nights have all turned me into the person that I am today and finally I am proud of who I am.

” Sobriety delivers everything that alcohol promised. “

A few years ago I could simply pick up my phone and get together with any of the 100’s of “friends” that I had for one insane night of drinking and partying. The next morning I would have a hangover after all the drinking and getting into bed at 3AM, I would sit and try to figure out how I spent all that money and then simply use the phrase “YOLO” and do it again the next evening. I would invite “friends” to go out and offer to pay for everything, drinks, transport and the food afterwards. The moment I decided to give sobriety a chance in my life, 99% of these “friends” were just gone, all of a sudden when I stopped paying, stop drinking with them they had no use for me anymore.

My new life attracted different people, the kind of people that I can call friends, my true friends stayed in touch and proved that they were friends, while the others never even sent a simple hello. This lifestyle also attracted the kind of woman that I have always wanted, someone with good habits, only good intentions and that wasn’t after my lifestyle or my spending habits, the woman that I want to spend the rest of my life with. She has been the main factor in this life changing transition. Some people went as far as saying that she was the reason that we stopped being friends, that is not true at all. I got a wake up call and realized that these people would not even send a message to ask what is going on if I stopped talking to them. I won’t lie, some of the friends that turned into “friends” shocked me, I actually thought that we had a genuine friendship, it hurt so bad.

My change in habits and friends came after a wake up call from sobriety and it’s the best call that I ever got. So much has change since I stopped drinking, mostly positive and it’s not even surprising at all. I have had the same phone for 12 months, that is unbelievable for me. My relationship with God has improved so much, it’s not where I want it to be yet but it will get there soon. When looking back at the financial position I was 12 months ago, I was close to being bankrupt with my expenses way over my income. I still haven’t recovered completely from a financial point of view but good things take time and I am pretty close to my goal of being debt free.

Sure it’s just money, but the burden that comes with debt is an unbearable stress that I could no longer take. In 12 months I have managed to pay off 70% of my debt, so pretty soon I will be debt free. I knew that I had messed up and the only way to get myself out of this mess was to do it myself. I had to lower my expenses drastically and the best way to achieve this was by selling my beloved car and letting go of my materialistic cravings. It wasn’t as painful as I thought and adapted easily, I will get my car back one day but for now I have been able to let go of the materialistic cravings that I once had. And guess what, I sold my car and the girl of my dreams stayed by my side, no surprises there. The right woman will stay by your side no matter what you own or what you are going through. She is a keeper and I am grateful and truly lucky to be able to call her my fiancé. We got engaged on the 3rd of April 2019, it was our 1 year anniversary while we were on holiday in China and I decided to pop the question there. Just one of the amazing things that have happened to me in the past year.

“Offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God – this is your true and proper worship.

Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”

Romans 12:1-2

Sobriety is a long road and there are no quick escapes from reality anymore, you have to face reality and face your problems instead of drinking or smoking them away. You have to walk through your emotions and you can’t ignore them. But I can guarantee you that this will be the most amazing and adventurous choice that you will ever make. Don’t be scared of what people will think, you will spend your life as a prisoner of your own mind if your decisions are based on what others think. The people who are meant to be in your life will always find their way back, even better they will never disappear from your life.

If you got this far, thank you for taking the time to read my post. You are awesome.

The photo that I choose was taken on my trip to China in April 2019, on Mount Huashan, known as the world’s most deadliest hike. I choose this photo because sobriety makes me feel free, as free as I felt on the tip of this insanely high mountain.